Snow’s Online Dating Rules

So I said I would write this up and a lot of people have asked me about it. So I’m sitting here writing it now.


Online relationships. We’ve all had them, and do have them, but should there be rules for this?? Should there be things that we need to follow in order to make it work and make it real? Well of course there is. There is always a way to make things work. Rules and guidelines make things much easier honestly, and here are Snow’s Rules/Guidelines for online dating. Just a way to keep it from that relationship that gets too serious, too fast, and always seems to end with you hating yourself wondering where you went wrong, when in reality you never had them in the first place.


Snow’s Rules to Online Dating.


1. They must be somewhat local to you.


This means that person in another state is a flat out no. Friends are okay, don’t get me wrong, but something serious cannot be with someone that’s not even in the same state. Also don’t get me started on someone that’s in another COUNTRY. Seriously… you’re going to tell me that it’s healthy to fall in love with someone you’ll never see?? Come on be real for a moment please.


2. Keep chats to casual things.


DO NOT get into too much detail. Don’t make you’re online chat a date. That’s what a date is for! Remember a chat is just a talk, not something more.


3. Don’t cyber with the person you JUST MET!


Seriously! Do not fucking do it. Be a fucking HUMAN and have a TALK. No this talk does NO include web cams, naked pictures, or talking about fucking so hard that your brains come out of your ears; especially when you JUST met the person. It could be a fucking creeper.


4. Don’t give the person your number right after meeting.


Use chats to get to know some things about a person before you give them your number. Seriously what if this person turns out to be a fucking psycho? You can track a LOT from someone’s phone number. You can find out his or her name, address, and a LOT of personal fucking information. Just don’t do it; it helps to keep down the crazies.


5. Have a few chats before you give out a ton of photos of yourself.


Yes really. Get to know some things before you send all those photos from your vacation and the ones of you naked. Men, no one wants to see your cock before they know some minimal details about yourself. Same goes for chicks damnit. Use your fucking brains!


6. When meeting, don’t just meet at your place/their place and fuck.


Seriously WHAT THE FUCK happened to going OUT for a date?? It’s like cus you’ve talked online a handful of times you’re automatically at that place where it can be sexual? Really?? Umm no whore you’re not. Get to fucking know someone before you sleep around. This is how you get fucked over with STDs and shit. Use your FUCKING HEADS! And not the one that goes IN THE PANTS. Dumbasses.


7. DO NOT keep it only online.


If this person is serious and wants to have something with you, then you should be able to meet. If not then you’ll never really have a relationship. You’ll have a story that you can keep going back to that has some new fucking excuse.




Make sure you really know someone. I’m not saying that you have to know someone’s life story when you first go out, and I’m not saying that you have to get married before you fuck someone, but PLEASE remember that there are people out there like this. Talk to the person online and face to face. Don’t think that you can stop talking just cus you’re not online. YOU HAVE A FUCKING MOUTH AND VOICE FOR A REASON.


9. Don’t be that clingy fucking person.


You know… the one that you talked to once and didn’t really get a vibe with. Or the one that you got that creeper vibe from so you stop talking to them and they seem to fucking pop up and stalk the fuck out of you?? Yeah, that person; don’t be them. Keep being yourself and leave the psycho drama somewhere else.


10. Online relationships CAN work with some common sense.


Don’t keep it online. Meet and get to know someone. Don’t just sit at your computer and have this amazing relationship that really is just nothing. If you’re going to be together online then you should be able to do that in REAL LIFE. You should be able to be face to face and have something awesome. If that’s not the case and it can only be “online” then something’s seriously fucking wrong.


I may or may not come up with more things to add to this, but here are 10 rules/guidelines for now. Hopefully they help!


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